nope, it’s not fair.
Life is unfair.
And I actually wouldn’t change that.
Huh?
I know, that’s strange. But hear me out. It’s not like I’m a misogynist. Oops, wait, that’s not what I mean. Well, I’m not a misogynist because, as it turns out, I don’t hate women. Like, at all. That’s like saying I hate people named Jessica. Although I do have this strange thing about wishing I was the only one with my name. Guess I need to still work on that whole sharing thing. Actually, my parents came close to naming me Honeysuckle, because I was born right when those wild flowers first make their summer appearance. And I know, having a name with the word suck in it would probably have given my parents just one more reason to have home schooled me, but hey! I bet I’d never meet anybody with my name, if I were Honeysuckle Latshaw. Wow, that’s a doozy.
But what I meant to say is that it’s not like I’m a masochist. And that doesn’t just mean…well that, right? It also means that you don’t want pain to be inflicted on you because you derive some sort of strange pleasure from it, right?
I’ll just assume that’s right.
But about life being unfair. A friend and I were talking about this. And we came to this conclusion: life is sometimes terribly unfair as in, what did I ever do to deserve this?; and life is also sometimes beautifully unfair as in, what did I ever do to deserve this?
And what if you took out the unfairness? ALL of it. You’d be left with death and taxes, I guess. Which are the only two things that are certain, according to Benjamin Franklin, anyway. And yes, I hate all the unfair tragedies. The randomness that makes us all wonder what God does with his omnipotence, anyway. It’s not like he sleeps. At least, not according to the Bible. And actually, I firmly believe that none of the evil that transpires around us is related to God at all. I think that it can be traced to us, to our selfishness, to living in a world that is, well, unfair; as well as living in a world in which we are not the center of the universe, that maybe a flood needs to happen or a fire needs to burn and no, that doesn’t make anyone feel any better about their house now being gone, but maybe it helps us to understand a little bit better.
Or at least keep us from building a house in a flood land or somewhere prone to fires.
And yes, it’s unfair that there are so many people who’s spouses treat them as they deserve to be treated, and yet, that didn’t happen for me. It’s unfair that many people are living in a home, when I am living in a bedroom (that is of course, in a home, but you know what I mean.) It’s unfair that I was faithful and was betrayed for my effort. Especially when that effort was spelled L-O-V-E. But for every unfair bad thing that’s happened, I can list an unfair beautiful thing that has happened. It’s unfair that so many people have parents who don’t have time or resources to really take care of them, while my parents bend over backwards to help me, to make sure that I know I am important and loved. It’s unfair that so many people are so busy working on surviving, on eating their next meal or just making their next payment, while I am able to spend time on crafts that have nothing to do with my basic survival needs. Music. Dance. Writing. And yes, I will spend my last breath telling you that these things are absolutely essential to living, but I will not try to make that argument to someone who’s stomach is empty, someone who cannot remember the last meal that they ate.
And then there’s grace. Mercy. A way we have with God, a close connection to his heart that starts in the way he loves us and ends there too.
That is so unfair.
And I don’t understand this unfairness. Any of it. Not the bad or the good–but I guess it’s not really up to me to understand it. I guess it’s up to me to live a grateful life; to try to make life as unfair as possible for others.
In the beautiful way, that is.
in I Lift My Eyes Up, Thoughts and Feelings
as Benjamin Franklin, death and taxes, God, home, Jessica, life, living in a world, Mercy, misogynist, name, right, strange pleasure, thing, wild flowers
Yes, I would agree. Although I would say that with the recent negative unfairness you experienced, I hope you have a huge run of unfair on the other side so in the end it balances out a little better (thus, being more fair. Huh weird.)
yeah, that is weird–and I do totally believe that we can reap what we sow, too. So I guess there is some sort of balance that happens with that–and I guess if a lot of unfairly good things happen–that will balance out the unfairly bad things that have happened. Making it kind of fair, like you said.
And now brain just exploded. Like what happened to my computer when I accidentally googled google.
If we all got what we really deserved none of us would be here, so I am very grateful that God, in his mercy and grace, always gives us better than we deserve. It’s humbling to think about, but amazing, too, because he loves us THAT much!
Totally agreed:)
Good conversation, Jess. One of my more realistic sayings: Life Is Unfair. I liked how you point out it’s unfair on both sides.
It’s time for the other side to happen for you!
But it has–the good part of getting more than I deserve, I mean–and it does. All the time. Though, I wouldn’t mind it happening more and more:)
BTW, you could NEVER be a misogynist—you’re not nor will you ever be a man.
Ohhhh…I didn’t realize that was a prerequisite. Good point!!!
You know, though, some of the people who hate women the most are women…
yeah, this is really true. I would much rather be pulled over by a male cop then a lady cop…not cause all lady cops hate women, but I have a better track record of NOT getting actual tickets with guy cops. Huh. maybe this is totally irrelevant to your point, Jase…!
Wishing you a very “unfair” month in the best way possible! LOL!!!!!
Thanks, JR!!! And you too;-)
Great post!! so true..what a good reminder that things can be unfair in a good way..i agree that i hope things keep being unfair in a good way for you:)
Thanks, Sarah:) and yeah, it’s easy to see all the wrongdoing that is so terribly unfair; but I do like to try to think about the things that are amazing–the things that i could never earn…
BEAUTIFUL. I love this post.
Also, I’m quite certain that you just named my first daughter. Honeysuckle Hornbuckle. Just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?
hahaha well I am a sucker for alliteration!!!
Yeah, I fear Honeysuckle will not like her alliterated name the same way. Jack’s best man thinks we should name our kid Henrietta Hornbuckle.
It’s not just alliteration, it rhymes! That’s an AWESOME name.
Sounds like part of the kind of little song-rhymes that kids jump rope to (this is of course, assuming that this is the 1950s or so). Cindarella, dressed in yella’ Honeysuckle Hornbuckle something something corn chuckle…
Okay, so it needs some work.
haha I don’t know–I think “corn chuckle” makes PERFECT sense…!
Yeah, not much rhymes with “Hornbuckle.” Or “Honeysuckle.”
which is why those two words are so perfect for each other!
and ewww–I think it’s weird that “strange pleasure” is now one of my tags.
Ha!!
I hasn’t read the whole thing yet because I have to go to school, but I do the same thing!! With my mouth!! It’s just automatic, I don’t think about it! Whoops, gotta go! Bye!
well now, that doesn’t surprise me at all, Lyr!!! Sometime we gotta put on our yellow pants, dance to Paper Gangsta, and then look at adorable pups and bite our teeth!!!