a date! and a song!
in Loved Ones, Thoughts and Feelings, video
as baby bunny, Charis, day, drew, Esther, hugs not drugs, Jason, Larry, life, need of prayer, Ollie, slip and slides, song, time, tonight, vietnamese food, Xerxes
My life is rich.
I mean, look at him.
We went on a date tonight. I agreed to drive since he’s underage and all and when I picked him up he had a lovely yellow sparkly card for me. Yellow. Of course. And inside the card, he thanked me for taking him on a date and told me that he loves me.
Like I said, my life is rich.
He also informed me that he wanted to get me flowers, but unfortunately ran out of time. Understandable. He had a very busy day of slip and slides and play-making, from what I heard over dinner tonight. And really, it’s the thought that counts. Well, at least in this case, anyway.
We went to Ollie’s favorite restaurant and had some amazing Vietnamese food. And then had some ice cream at Friendly’s, which is always perfect, if you ask me. We also saw a baby bunny eating some grass outside and how hilarious this sentence would be if I swopped out eating for smoking.
But hugs, not drugs, baby bunny!
It was an altogether adorable night and I think I might love one-on-one time with people I love more than anything else.
And yesterday I had the pleasure of speaking with a man named Larry on the phone about buying a certain bedroom set that I never do want to see again. We were talking about addresses and what his ETA might be to pick it up when all of the sudden he started talking me through it. What? I know, that’s how I felt too. He was telling me that he had been divorced, too. TOO. You know, me and Larry. So much in common. And that he had gotten through it. And then he told me that he’d pray for me and that’s real nice, it really is, but it’s bad enough getting random Larrys out and about buying your bed, but when they start praying for you too…Well, let’s just say that’s when you’re like, yep. this is my life. take a nice inhalation because this is what it smells like–larry praying for you.
And nope, I am not an ounce above Larry’s prayers.
But seven months ago my life didn’t look quite so much like it was in such obvious need of prayer by total strangers who are buying my bed. Not a complaint, though; just an observation. And I am not crying or anything; I actually think it’s kind of funny.
Oh, and tonight I got home to a quiet and dark house. This might sound creepy, but I kind of like it. Because there was the piano, all begging to be played and it was like, you spend all day with kids and they make you necklaces out of gimp and you wear them! and yet you’re gonna just walk on by…?
So I was like, You’re right, piano. And if you made me a necklace out of gimp, I’d wear it too.
So I sat down and played and then I decided to play a ballad that I wrote for the play my brother wrote that he asked me to turn into a musical by way of adding tunes. And if you are an editor, please, have yourself a field day with that terrible sentence.
And there was one song in particular that strikes a chord with me. Jason emailed me, asking me if I would have a very hard time writing a sad song for Esther to sing; that this song should be something about how Xerxes (which happens to be Drew’s screen name for just about everything, ironically enough) falls very short of his role as husband and how Esther is a woman of worth, despite how she is treated by him.
Do you think you could handle writing something like that? he asked, more than a little tongue in cheek.
So I sat down and wrote it in just a few minutes, it felt. Bam. Here’s a little bit of what’s happened to me, a little bit of my childhood, and a little bit of hope anyway.
It’s called You’ll Know Him. And my niece Charis sure did knock it out of the park when she sang it on stage, by the way.
dumb dumb dumb
in Funny Stuff, Thoughts and Feelings
as blah, Christian, dumb thing, hugs not drugs, man, part, societal expectations, thick accent, thing, tylenol, tylenol pm, wanna
Oh, I do dumb things sometimes.
Okay, so I did a dumb thing once.
Ha.
I think I will have to stick with my original statement.
Like the time I was really sad and afraid of the night, afraid of the quiet, afraid of my thoughts, and decided it would be a good idea to take a tylenol pm. Well okay, I took a tylenol pm four times. And everyone was all, Is that a good idea? Are you gonna be okay? Blah blah blah we care we care we care while I was all, Blah blah blah I wanna sleep wanna sleep wanna sleeeeeeeeep.
I mean, it’s not like I took five or anything.
And then my friend Christian came over to talk some sense into my sad little brain and by the end of our talk I was really feeling the effects of my decision concerning the dosage of the tylenol pm and abruptly announced that I was either going to have to sit down or throw up.
To which he responded, Well then sit down!!!
And I guess that’s why he’s a good counselor; he regularly gives sound advice like that.
But I did one even better than that. I went to bed and proceeded to sleep like the dead, waking up about thirteen hours later feeling like Rumpelstiltskin rising out of bed with that niggling thought that you are probably late for something.
But yeah, that was kind of dumb. And for the record, I highly agree with the sentiment expressed in hugs not drugs. And also for the record, I think hugs can be kind of weird. Like a slow dance without the music. Especially when they’re lingering and you’d rather have moved on to the next stage of societal expectations, thank you.
But some hugs.
They can be really sweet.
I will say that.
Now onto my next dumb thing I’ve done.
Today, in fact.
There was a man who looked Russian nearby, so we had that in common, I guess. The looking Russian part, not the man part. Ew. Man part. Okay, moving on. But, in a thick accent, he told me that I have a beautiful body.
I know, creepy alert number one.
So I thanked him and then he asked me if I am a model.
So I said no, that I’m a dancer.
Professional? he asked. Yes, I answered.
And then he told me that he has lots of jobs available for dancers and asked me for my card. And I know, Jason, I need to get a card. But I told him I didn’t have one, so I could give him my email address.
And then he offered the option of me giving him my number.
And yes, probably another creepy alert.
And remember how I sometimes do dumb things? Well case in point: I did it. I gave him my number. But (deep breath)
Idon’teverhavetotalktohimbecauseIdon’thavetoanswermyphoneifhecalls
andnowthatIthinkaboutitIdon’tthinkhisjobsareevenlegitimate.
But I admit, it was a dumb thing to do.
Here’s to tomorrow; a blank slate.
Here’s to better choices and all that.
