oh, it’s monsoon season.
in Funny Stuff, I Lift My Eyes Up, Thoughts and Feelings
as Cause, chagrin, gleam, life, messes, MONSOON, monsoon season, pair, puddles, Pussycat, pussycat dolls, sky, slippage, song, tectonic plates, truth, ukelele, umbrella, way, wet socks, white dress, WORSE, yeah
I am not sure that you are aware of this, but it is apparently monsoon season in New York City.
Also known as: JESSICA, DON’T FORGET YOUR UMBRELLA AGAIN! SEASON.
Also known as: IS THERE ANYTHING WORSE THAN WET SOCKS? SEASON.
And yes, there is something worse than wet socks. But just one thing, really: socks that slip under your heels while you’re walking. Oh, just thinking about it makes me feel deeply uncomfortable. I’ve been known to flat-out throw away the aforementioned offending socks and buy a brand new pair while mid-errand.
And if you’ve ever experienced sock-slippage, then I think that you really cannot blame me at all.
But the sky has been downright torrential these last few days. Like the earth has been crying for water! so much now that the sky has gotten a suspicious gleam in its eye as it shows just how much water it can pour down when it wants to.
“Be careful what you ask for, cause you just might get it,” the Sky says to the Earth, shutting it right up. But only until Earth realizes that the Sky just quoted a Pussycat Dolls song and so the Earth starts to laugh. And there is nothing subtle about the Earth laughing. It’s mountains moving powerful. It’s tectonic plates jumping powerful.
So yeah, the Sky notices.
And then the Sky rains harder cause now it’s mad that the Earth is making fun of it (and a little embarrassed to be caught quoting the Pussycat Dolls, truth be told), and here I am: standing in wet socks and feeling like none of this is really my fault at all.
Such is life sometimes, friends; such is life.
We clean up messes we did not make; this is unfair.
And yet, others sometimes clean up the messes that we did make; this is also unfair.
And life is messy.
And sometimes you get wet. Really, really wet.
But you figure out how to wrap your ukelele in plastic so as to keep it safe and you figure out how to jump over the puddles and you realize a brand new connection with all the other people on the subway who also look like drowned rats (though they were smart enough not to wear a white dress, you notice with more than an ounce of chagrin) and you revel in being human and feeling and the fact that we all get wet sometimes and then we all get dry and you wouldn’t really have it any other way because if something was one way all the time then life would be boring.
And life is many, many things, but boring?
Well, never; never boring at all.
But anyway, happy monsoon season, guys.
Go out and celebrate by getting yourself a nice pair of rain boots.
our best.
in I Lift My Eyes Up, Thoughts and Feelings
as belly, bests, dancing, dancing feet, disappointment, everybody, God, Jess, Low, messes, offensive word, question, resilience, ridiculousness, shifting sands, something, stomach, version, wonder
We’re all just trying our best.
I try to remember that.
Even when I am talking to my friend late at night; we’re laughing about the latest ridiculousness one of us has come across and suddenly I’m crying.
I’m asking that question that everybody tries to encourage right out of me.
“There’s nothing wrong with you, Jess,” they say.
But I wonder.
Anyway.
I wonder.
And then I try to remember this:
We’re all just trying our best.
And sometimes our bests don’t match up.
His or her best can look real bad from where I’m standing.
Disappointing.
To me, I mean.
But then I swallow it down.
I’ve tasted worse, I think.
I swallow it down and then I feel it settle into my stomach.
And all that disappointment in my stomach pulls on my heart until, eventually, it settles down there, too.
And maybe that’s why we sometimes say we’re feeling low.
Cause all that disappointment and every bit of my heart now, too–it’s all low down in my belly.
And I swallow again so as not to say an offensive word.
But it’s okay.
And I still try my best.
Just like we all do.
Or at least I’m gonna believe that we do.
And something else.
I don’t stay here.
Low.
Not anymore.
I am astounded by the resilience of us all.
By our ability to evolve with the world around us; to learn to step gingerly–even gracefully–with the shifting sands ever underneath our dancing feet.
And God.
Not even just around us.
Not even above us, so much.
But within us.
Inconceivably.
Changing our best to something much better than the small and dreamless messes we manage to make again and again.
Pulling us from low and setting us onto something higher than we knew.
Making our own version of the best into something that actually is the best.
finally weightless
in I Lift My Eyes Up, Thoughts and Feelings
as basket, everything, God, last transaction, left lung, messes, pain, Peace, sane person, sense, sense life, sentimental/inspiration
Peace. But what about the experiences that would teach any sane person to be anxious?Sometimes it’s hard to know what to do with it, and it feels crazy to not feel anxious. But then there’s God and he messes up the equation and the sense life makes, I suppose. He talks about peace and it [...]
