on beastly doings.
in Funny Stuff, Thoughts and Feelings
as beast, bugs, car, card, doings, far edges, guard, handsome boy, handsome boys, middle, mine, nobody, Single, single ladies, standing guard, ton, way
So, not to brag or anything so unrefined as that, but I must just mention that I am a beast.
Let me tell you why I am a beast.
I made a card for my friend. And yes, that is certainly beast-like in and of itself, but that is not what qualifies me as a beast. I put that card on top of my piano. And then I played Single Ladies. I know, I know–yet another beast-like quality of mine. However, the real beast part comes when the card slipped behind the piano. Like, all the way behind it. And it wasn’t on the far edges, either. The far reachable edges. It was smack dab in the middle of those 88 keys, except it was all the way behind them, wedged between the back of the piano and the wall. With about one hundred or so stink bugs standing guard behind there also.
Shoot, I thought.
I said nothing, though, cause I was alone.
Not that that always keeps me from talking out loud. Today, in fact, I laughed pretty hard all by myself at something in the car. I can’t remember what was so funny anymore, but I do remember laughing and then thinking it odd that nobody was there to laugh with me. And then I thought it was kinda cool. Like, the laugh was totally genuine. Nobody to fake it or force it for or try to convince them that don’t worry, I think they’re funny.
Anyway.
I tried to lift the piano and move it. But, due to the fact that it weighs about five tons and I weigh, like, a lot less than even one ton, the piano didn’t budge. It didn’t even strain. It was all like, “Look. You can play Single Ladies on me, sure. But don’t even begin to think I’m about to get up and move. Not now, not ever. Not unless you bring back all those nice, handsome boys who brought me here. They are the only ones for whom I will move.”
Sometimes it really sucks to not be a nice handsome boy, you know.
Then I tipped the piano over. In a sort of dip, if you will. Since my piano is apparently a hopeless romantic, willing to do anything for some nice, handsome boys, then I figured it might just be willing to be dipped. Even by me. I think it at least helps that I am tall. And dark-ish. But that’s where it stops.
Things cascaded off the top of the piano. There was a great crash as those cascading things hit some bass clef keys with a glorious smash. I kept tipping the piano. And then I reached my go-go-gadget arm behind it and had the AWOL card in my grasp. I didn’t even flinch at all the stinkbugs nearby as I pulled the card out from where it was inconveniently wedged and set the piano back to its usual upright position.
“But the nice, handsome boys–when are they coming back?” the piano wanted to know.
You and me both wanna know, piano; you and me both.
(Just kidding. Most of those boys, while handsome and very nice, are either married or related to me)
But anyway–fishing out my card from behind a super heavy piano. That is why I am a beast.
a few days’ worth of pics and words.
in Funny Stuff, Loved Ones, Performance, photography
as blur, boi, card, Don, janes, Jase, Jason, purse, Shane, sleep, Summer Molestice, ton, Yep
This weekend was a blur, I think.
A beautiful blur, but still.
I didn’t get a ton of sleep. I have many pictures here, but none of them are of me sleeping because, right: I didn’t get a ton of sleep. Too bad, because you know how I love to post pics of me sleeping.
But I did go to the Summer Molestice. And Shane and I got to play there, which was pretty awesome.
And people listened, which makes a show even better, I’ve learned.
And I got a new pair of boots.
Yes, that has nothing to do with the Paper Janes or the Summer Molestice, but well, I’m liking them very much, so I thought I’d mention it.
And Shane and I really need to make a card. This is something we say very often but rarely do. Actually, we never do it. And every time someone asks us for our card, I feel pretty dumb as I reach into my purse, rip a receipt in half, and scrawl some of our info down for them.
Which is what I did for the man in the far right of the above picture, after he asked us for our card. And then he told us that he wants to produce our little rap, boi boi boi. And yep, that’s how it’s spelled. And yep, it’s a rap. But he was pretty excited about it and I guess we shall see if that happens or not.
I’ve learned that people say a lot of things and maybe it’s well intentioned and maybe they mean it as they say it, but I don’t put much stock in things people say they will do until it’s pretty much done.
At least when it comes to things like producing.
And wow, just wow, because my brother Jase decided that he would put on one of our dogs harnesses and run people around in the dog cart.
It was pretty hilarious.
And I don’t know who enjoyed it more–Jase or whoever was getting carted around at the time.
And afterwards, Jason said that he thought it would be easier. He mentioned that he thought he’d be able to run like the wind in front of that dog cart.
But keep trying, Jase! Cause we certainly don’t mind the rides around the yard, even if you don’t quite run like the wind.
Yet.
And last but not least, today was Father’s Day and we all pitched in to get my pop a whopper of a gift.
I made a poster because presentation is everything, you know.
And pop is quite delighted at the prospect of his DNA test.
We were joking about all the many results that could come of it. One of the Sand People from Star Wars, Bald Man, and Any Ethnicity That He Is So Clearly Not So Wouldn’t That Be So Funny? are all in the running, but I suppose we’ll have to be patient and see.
And of course, his results effect all of us, so we all have some vested interest in this test.
Don’t worry, I’ll keep you posted.
